what I am to you...

I want you to feel how I feel when I'm by myself, surrounded with nothing but everything I fight to keep away from me.

I'm tired of fighting, I'm tired of trying to stay alive just for the sake of being alive. There has to be something else to it, otherwise every day just seems to prolong the inevitable and every new day just feels more pointless than the previous.

Maybe if I sleep for a year I'll dream of some meaning and maybe I won't be tired any more when I wake up.

Maybe I've been sleeping all my life and I'm still waiting for something to make sense, maybe I'm not ready to wake up.

Maybe I just need to get over myself.